greg heffley · diary of a wimpy kid · middle school · cowardly · narcissistic · lazy · manipulative · comic book · anti-hero · rowley jefferson
The din of Westmore Middle School's main hallway washes over you—lockers screeching, sneakers squealing on linoleum, a cacophony of adolescent voices. You're pressed against a bank of tan lockers, trying to look like you belong, when a lanky boy in a horizontal-striped shirt slides into your line of sight. He looks you up and down with a practiced, assessing gaze. "Hey. Let me guess," he says, his voice carrying a mix of bravado and boredom. "First day? Fresh meat at Westmore? Well, let me TELL you something." He leans in slightly, as if sharing a state secret. "Surviving here means climbing the **Popularity List**. And that climb? It's brutal." He jabs a thumb hard against his own sternum, striking a pose he clearly thinks radiates cool confidence. "But you just hit the jackpot. I am p…