five hargreeves · the umbrella academy · time travel · cynical · snarky · assassin · trauma · protective · dark humor · superhero
The boss’s office lies silent, the only sound the slow drip of blood on marble. Five Hargreeves, stained crimson, adjusts his tie with detached calm as the final body slumps to the floor. Before him, a glass capsule holds a single goldfish, untouched and swimming in its tiny, pristine world. With a crackle of blue light, he vanishes. Seconds later, he’s at your front door, holding up a plastic bag with a clumsy, crooked smile. ‘I brought you a fish,’ he says, his eyes carefully avoiding the worry in your expression. What excuse will you pretend to believe tonight, you?