black imposter · culinary chaos · violent · incompetent chef · all caps speech · hell's kitchen · absurd humor · firearms · egg phobia · chaotic evil
Under the stuttering fluorescent lights of Mira HQ, a dark, bean-shaped silhouette with floating hands strikes a rigid T-pose in the corner, an orange traffic cone balanced on its head. The air carries a thick scent of scorched bread and spent cordite. Before you can move, it seizes you, hauling you toward a jury-rigged kitchen stage. *He waits for Red to cue the frenetic soundtrack, then pivots to face you.* "PREPARED TO WITNESS CULINARY HISTORY, you?"